5 Stupid Reasons Not To Home School (and Do Public School Instead)

[Rey Reynoso]

In defensive discussions justifying my parental rights and educational choices for my children, I often find myself repeating my lists of reasons. I have 10 solid reasons why we home-school, which I was going to post today, but then I had an internal struggle.

What if people (as they sometimes do) started offering some responses which tied into some incomprehensibly stupid reasons to opt out of home-schooling and send my kids to school? I mean, they'd see this post and think I was spring boarding off of their incomprehensibly stupid comments. I am therefore ethically required to post this first!

My second struggle is that this post can only exist if people understand my number one reason for home-schooling: I can't afford private school. I really can't. I'm trying to save for retirement and the college education of three kids; it's impossible to pay private school tuition right now.

With conscience assuaged, and the number one reason listed to my reader (that's you), all struggles are rested. I can unapologetically offer five undeniably and incomprehensibly stupid reasons to opt-out of home school and send kids to school:

1. To get them to socialize. If you're sending your kids to school to socialize then you're sending them for the wrong reason. My kids are part of a library group, a soccer team, a group thing at the YMCA, a kids club at church and a Sunday school at another church. You can get them to socialize, but without a proper education, all you've taught them is which hands to grease.
2. To let them learn how to struggle. This, unfortunately, has nothing to do with educational struggle but everything to do with societal struggles. What the person invariably means is "how to deal with bad teachers" or "how to deal with bullies" which are both two sides of the same coin. One set of bullies uses his fists; the other set of bullies uses his or her power. But I can't see a morally justifiable reason to inflict bullying on anyone. The lesson usually winds up being (1) become faster, (2) become stronger, (3) learn how to cheat the system. If those are the invaluable lessons, thanks…we'll pass.
3. Because I can't handle it. Once again, the reason to send kids to school is to get them educated, not so that you have a public funded baby-sitting service. If you truly believe that the Public School is great education wise, by all means, send your kids. But if you're sending them because you can't handle it then you're selling both your kids, and yourself, short.
4. Because everyone else is doing it. If your main reason for sending your kids to public school is because you fear being scorned by friends and family, welcome to being a pushover to the whims of peer pressure. If you want to teach your kids not to submit to bullying, address this area before all others.
5. To get them to preach the Gospel to fellow unbelievers. Or, in other words, being salt and light (Matthew 5).Just because you're a Christian that has raised your children in that environment doesn't mean that your Children are Christians. Even if they are Christians it doesn't mean they're necessarily strong Christians. More often than not, a kid sent to school to evangelize is going to wind up a product of whoever he is evangelizing; not vice versa.

Hopefully your mental facilities haven't been irreparably damaged by suffering under such incomprehensibly stupid reasoning: good thing neither of us employs it. I do plan to make it up to you with my 10 reasons for opting for homeschooling over other forms of schooling.

[ScottL]

Here is our discussion thread from a few months back about schooling.

[ScottL]

Rey -

I most certainly agree with this statement of yours: The Bible teaches that believers are salt and light already; that's not optional. What I don't trust is that my kids are believers.

I love to emphasise who we already are. But I do also want to emphasise that, because we are, let's walk it out. Many Christians don't really know they already are salt and light, already are witnesses by the Spirit's power (Acts 1:8). So we tell them they are, and then we encouraged them to walk out who they already are.

Now, if you were a covenantalist, then you would know your children are believers. ;) (I don't take that standpoint.)

[H]

Just my negative numbers observation, from experience:

I homeschooled two of my boys for a little while and then, when our circumstances changed and I was forced to go to work, they went to school...at first a Christian school (mediocre education), where I also taught art (if you could call it that), but then a large public high school. As I dropped my son off on the first day of high school, I had to finally face, in that gut-wrenching, rubber-meets-the-road moment that mommy would no longer be there throughout the day (that day, with many more to come) to watch over him, but that I could, and would commend this precious child to the care and keeping of his Father and mine and that it would be OK. It was a huge moment in my life of both learning to put my money where my mouth was in terms of really trusting God, and letting go and allowing my son to start to become something more than a mama's boy. It was difficult. I am fiercely over-protective. The school was a large city high school - a comparatively good one, but still...

I went through the whole thing all over again the day I dropped him off at college, and I prayed through my tears, as we drove away, for God to help me again to trust him with my baby,,,

My baby is now a grown-up, a man who just graduated from Penn State with a BS in Animal Sciences and is contemplating Veterinary Medicine as his next step. I pray for his relationship with God, for it isn't as close as I would wish it to be, but by the grace of God my son has evaded the major pitfalls of high school and college life, and I KNOW that, no matter where he is, God has him - as he has my other children, and I continue to internalize, through these experiences, the truth that God is trustworthy, and that I can trust him in a very personal and intimate way for all the rest to come - concerning them and everything else.

Yep, I know you know all this. Just a reminder for those times when choices are limited.

[Char]

Raq, take a look at the discussion on vocation. We can say we love our children by providing for their spiritual needs, but also by providing for their physical, emotional and mental needs. These aren't less real or important.

[Rey Reynoso]

Ah, I see.

My priority in rearing my children is to get them to understand that all they've been given, all they've been blessed with, is a gift from their maker. They should therefore take all aspects of their lives and submit it to Christ as their Lord and Master.

I don't know if they have come to terms with that. Therefore my priority is to teach them what it looks like. When I take them to the library I speak about the glories of the infinite God who would establish a country that funds these sorts of things. When I hold a book, I speak about the wonders of the wise God who would give us language so that we can learn from previous generations. When I deal with people in the super market I exemplify kindness to the cashier who has been working for hours and speak to my Children about the necessity of being kind to others, because God has been kind to us.

Believing parents should be doing this no matter what schooling: private, public or home. They are reflecting Christ's Lordship and Mastery over their lives in his proper place. So even if there are 17 kids in the family (like the Duggers...or like you!) then they are being equipped on an individual basis with some valuable examples; if they're taught at home or away.

Now, as for my allusions, yeah, I am not communicating that. I don't think it is more likely to accomplish this goal at home. I think poor, incapable people who public school can also accomplish this goal.

My reasons for homeschooling, though, will come in another post.

[Raquel]

Ultimate goal is...

If it's that our children will grow into disciples then what's the best way to accomplish that? My answer to that question is that it ought to be on an individual basis.

Otherwise, why keep them home? If disciples are our top priority then every step along the way is meant to accomplish that, no? You SEEM to be alluding that they would be more likely to accomplish this goal at home. But maybe I'm misunderstanding your priorities.

[Rey Reynoso]

But then I'd waste a post, Char. It's all about Me and My Comments.

[Char]

NOT RAQUEL! ME!

[Char]

Well, duh. You should oblige me.

[Rey Reynoso]

Well, my sister does the same thing when it comes to homeschooling. She would rather that we left our kids in the hands of the professionals and let them do their job. The thing is, I know that, based on the area, she is an exception to teachers--not the rule.